Dating is an affair of the heart, it’s a special attempt at connecting with the heart of the date to see if you can connect, once connected things soar to new heights in a wonderful experience of love and heartfelt feelings. Unfortunately, though, for some dating is nothing more then a challenge. They want the thrill of heading out and dating anyone they can, some even seek a certain person out just because they never were able to get a date with them. These kind of people you want to avoid. Dating is serious business, not some game. Yeah, dating should be fun, but not to that extent.
You aren’t some prize for a date like that, so you shouldn’t be treated like you are. Have some self respect. But don’t get me wrong, when we date we love the fact that we got the guy or girl, but what I explained is just wrong. As a human we like to often reach out for a challenge, we love to strive for the better in life, going upward in life, so seeing someone that one would think is out of our dating league is something we would naturally be attracted to. Whether its wealth, good looking, personality or just someone we didn’t think was our ‘type’, we are attracted to what we don’t think we can get, and then try to get it. So date someone nice and smart so a good thing gets added onto a good thing. And don’t worry about the fictional saying ‘too much of a good thing is a bad thing’ because that’s wrong. You can never have too much of a good thing, never. Unless you would rather be getting it all bad because you believe that junk.
What’s interesting is that when dating, we tend to be interested in these people of the ‘higher status’, we are able to adapt out side of our social sphere that we are used to and most comfortable with, the one we live with, and go for these other people. Because generally speaking, we will often date the type of people we have dated in the past, because that’s what you are used to, and yet almost everyone is, at least a little bit, attracted to these ‘higher status’ people.
So, every so often a challenge will arise. This doesn’t make you a thrill seeker like we spoke of earlier. Let’s say you’re a guy and you see this nice girl that you fancy. This is the type of girl that probably wouldn’t even glance your way. BAM! The challenge is set! You now ‘need’ to get this girls attention, you ‘need’ to ask her out, you ‘need’ to achieve in this challenge. The reason we do this is because, of course, yeah she may be pretty, may not have the best personality if she wouldn’t look at you, but challenges are actually healthy. They take you out of your comfort zone and allow you to grow, growing as a human being is one of the best things you can do. It also adds to your confidence levels, even more so if you actually get the girl.
Now, I for one never fell in love with some model, I was always realistic and always just wanted a fair, cute, goofy and funny girl, which thankfully I got now, but its normal human reaction to want to date a supermodel or a superstar. It’s not only normal but it’s probably expected! What we perceive as perfection is something we will naturally strive for, even in our wildest fantasies. Of course, the chances of you getting hooked with one is sorta far out there, but sometimes that doesn’t prevent us at taking the challenge anyway. But you need to always remember that the person you hear sing or see in a movie or on a talk show isn’t always what it appears to be. They can be total jerks or a real keeper, its a gamble. You need to remember they are actors, and as actors they can fake expressions and feelings with ease.
When you have a partner you tend to be more popular, and that is because when you have a partner people see you as attractive (to have a partner) and that you most be successful in dating and relationships. Because if they have you and you have them and you respect this person and love them enough to do anything, then there really must be something special about you after all. It shows them that you have something that they seem to be missing, they see you with someone and wonder why can’t they get a special someone instead of dating a few hundred people. They see you with someone and they will probably want you, they want to see if they can get you, and if they can then they wont feel as empty as they do when watching you.
Of course though, if you leave your original partner for this new one then there wasn’t much about you then. Leaving someone for another pretty face is low. And that’s not attractive, it will ward people away.
As for sex, those that do it with everyone just shows immaturity. It shows they just want to see how many they can have sex with. They don’t ‘love’ YOU, they love your body. You want to stay away from these kind of people at all costs. That’s not real love, they only want to see how many people they can get in bed with them. You would be just another number to them. They are trouble, and if you date trouble you will get trouble.
So, final thoughts, challenges in dating will never leave us, us as humans they are natural. There’s always a part of us wanting to get something or someone we feel is out of reach. So keep your eyes open, make sure you’re dating the right people and keep your expectations low so you’re not disappointed. Never know, someone may surprise you down the road.